Texas Tech University Athletics
Anything you can do, I can do ... maybe not better
March 12, 2010 | Softball
March 12, 2010
LUBBOCK, Texas - by OSR Staff (Matthew Johnson)
reprinted by special permission from OSR (link to the publication on the sidebar, sign up to receive it!)
So before I wrote this column, I was told to be careful with comparisons to anything involving beer-league softball. That can be tough for a 24-year-old fresh out of college.
So I did something different.
According to Dictionary.com, the fourth definition for different is: not ordinary; unusual.
Well, that's exactly what I experienced Tuesday afternoon while trying to become a Texas Tech softball player.
For many moons of my youth, I played baseball and football and the occasional soccer, but focused mostly on baseball, my favorite sport. I've always had a pretty decent swing, mixed with good timing and the rare power production.
Tuesday was well, for lack of a better definition, not ordinary; unusual.
Before I get started here's a timeline of my Tuesday:
• 10:15 a.m. - I woke up to the sound of my next door neighbor hammering something into the side of his house, not cool.
• 10:16 a.m. - I let my 12-week-old puppy outside so he could do his doggy things.
• 11 a.m. - Watched SportsCenter for a little while, until I decided I better begin stretching.
• Noon - Call roommate to help me get up off the floor from too much stretching.
• 1 p.m. - I took my first round of Tylenol. The prescribed dose, nothing more.
• 1:30 p.m. - Arrive at Rocky Johnson Field to take batting practice from Texas Tech softball coach Shanon Hays.
• 1:45 p.m. - A tear slid down my face as assistant coach Kristie Fox gave me the bat I was going to use.
• 2 p.m. - I learned the proper way to hit a softball, much different from a baseball swing, more to come on this later.
• 2:10 p.m. - My confidence was through the roof after learning to hit better, albeit off a batting tee.
• 2:15 p.m. - I stepped into the batter's box against Hays, another tear.
I'll stop here for a minute because this is where the unusual comes in. Most grown men have stepped into a batting cage once or twice and prepared themselves for a pitch to come toward them in a downward motion with the intent to swing as hard as possible to show off for Susie Q. during their date. Guys want to hit that game-winning homerun that wins the world series, and if not the game, her heart.
That is why men do most things right? To show off?
I stepped into the box ready as can be. Cheers were going off in the background as the team was applauding my effort to step in, excited about what the outcome would be.
I was fully intent on showing off my mane. I wanted to show these girls, "Hey, look what I can do."
First pitch, a bunt attempt ... emphasis on attempt.
Second pitch, whiff. Third pitch: CONTACT, fouled off my left foot. Injury one.
After a few fouls and another foul off the foot, I reared back and let a huge swing fly ... Injury two.
I swung so hard, I still feel a little soreness when turning to the side.
Coach Fox then explained that Hays would provide all the power I needed, all I had to do was get the bat on the ball.
Easy coming from a professional.
I got a few good licks in before I realized the girls had wandered away. They were no longer interested in what I was doing.
Back to the timeline:
• 3 p.m. - I walked out of the softball facility and headed back to my truck, smile on the face, pain in the eyes.
• 3:05 p.m. - I cried alone in my truck for a few minutes as I cracked the ice pack and let it rest on my lower back.
• 3:15 p.m. - Tylenol round two. Double prescribed amount.
• 4 p.m. - Reminisced about what it was like to be in shape and twelve years younger.
All-in-all, it was a great experience, I learned a lot, I gained some respect, and lost some pride all in the same day.
For all men out there who say, "Well a softball is bigger and it doesn't travel as fast, and I'm a man, I can hit anything. Blah, blah blah, man stuff!"
Wrong!
My mom raised me to be a good man and respect women and their rights, but I was stuck in that category until Tuesday.
See what's real unusual about the whole situation guys, no matter how well you do at hitting a softball, and trust me it's harder than it looks, there are upwards of 10,000 women in this country who probably do it better.
So next time you think, "Well that looks easy, heck, she can do it," put your humble hat on, remember the pain and sacrifice I made, and walk away.
--
Note: The author was actually pretty successful at hitting a softball. Many of us who've been around the game have seen plenty of media "take a hack" at a softball. Matt actually connected a few times, which means he was stellar!
